FETISH

Archive for 2009|Yearly archive page

I Need to be sent back to the Factory for Retuning.Where’s my Warranty?

In 1 on December 19, 2009 at 6:27 pm

I cannot believe it. A wonderful lady who is a pro Photographer, her burlesque work as well as other kinds in black and white is gorgeosity, asked me to sit for her, we had it all set up for this morning, I was absolutely tickled and looking forward to collabing with her.

And, I did not hear the alarm this morning. Now generally speaking I hear every breath within 200 ft, and I wake at 5am.

I missed out. And bumped the time of this generous pro. I am devastated, and embarrassed. Flying out of her Monday, no time to reschedule.

I’ve been taking my own photos for two years and had hoped some might go well with my writing submissions, plus some could be a little ham for the cam straight out fun.

My warranty is obviously expired. It’s not all hanging together well.

Holy. The disappointment and embarrassment….

I need some sort of tweaking, obviously, but this, this was inexplicable.

I could cry. Cat

It Got Lonely inside the Bermuda Triangle..No, You Can’t make me Leave there.

In 1 on December 19, 2009 at 2:06 am

So, this blogspace has been defunct for 5 months. Hmm, went to NYC, and NJ and then took the default option. ..

Lost my words, spent the summer on energy drinks, cigs and air, maudlin and moody. Generally speaking was difficult and nasty to those who contacted me, and crawled increasingly into the closet. Now am back in NYC for a mid december visit, perusing the bookshelves to see the lousy erotica that’s being published..

meeting some fine upstanding NYC citizens, and angsting about the pipes bursting back home. I’ve been quiet about the whole edifice of D/s over the months, generally taking..I cannot help my own jaded state…a rather cynical approach to the approach of others..it’s not winning me any girl guide cookies…but WTF..

I find myself wanting to pen emails such as listen you fukfaced twat why aren’t you responding…this on business matters, not romantic connections.

It’s been a five month blast and a half. Yeah. Thankfully there are still some souls out there who still talk to me.

Moving thru.  The words, the words, will come.

cat..staring into my corona, havent looked at this blog in 5 months, hahahha,sigh. bare with me.

Second Sehkmet Release/ Vamp goth Bdsm novella/Lucifer Lazerus and Poecatt

In D/s, Bdsm, Daily news update..art,writing, collaborations, upcoming events, goth culture on June 15, 2009 at 11:52 pm

Sehkmet has been released again. The interlude to the opening trilogy..the poem Skyrape, set to visual artist Lucifer Lazerus’s artistic interpretation…

The poem Skyrape written by Poecatt  is a noir goth dreamscape inspired by conversations between artist and writer last autumn. Sprung whole from Poecatt’s musings on the darkly sanguine indulgences of vampiric lore, both historic and contemporary, and its edged marginal positioning as Bdsm fetish,

Skyrape became the genesis of a collaboration that continues to unfold in Sehkmet.

We bring you this second installment as a continuation of a treat, and welcome feedback as the style and presentation has altered, as promised.

Contact us thru http://www.luciferlazerus.com..

Available for  carniverous and enticing free viewing at http://www.luciferlazerus.com

Who is Sehkmet?

look back into the shadows cast by Skyrape…the scent of bloodletting

on someone’s tongue..

poecatt

Update second Sehkmet Release..Lucifer lazerus and poecatt..poecatt on the skew wing.

In D/s, Bdsm, Daily news update..art,writing, collaborations, upcoming events, My journal, On Art/writing/creativity on June 9, 2009 at 11:35 am

Flying Air catt. Living out of a travel bag, taking in New Jersey.

Lucifer and I are still hoping to get to some artistic merger….my mind has kickedback in, temporary suspension of semantics has lifted, am penning again.

I usually have something  to say about where I travel..been rendered somewhat speechless by the jersey ambience..small town Assville.  Rockin on.

Hope to start taking pics soon. This is me the night before I flew, stretching out the arms.  It’s all shuffling like a pack of haphazardly tossed cards ,impressions that will stack up when  I return.

I’m sure the right brain and left brain will have met in in the middle by then,

and there will be some convergence and output.

Whatever, surviving, waving, hoping to bring you some fresh new collab soon.

Ps. check out the teaser cover of Lucifer’s and my Sehkmet 2nd release interlude…coming soon..check this out at his site at http://www.luciferlazerus.com

The release will be on the 16th, we continue to welcome your comments.

if you are having problems viewing check out scribed.com, first release fully viewable for free, plus our collection of illustrated erotic celtic poetry..For the Love of  Orange,a delightful sampling of our art and poetiks merged.

off to NYC tomorrow, catsmirks, later!

En Route..happicattin.

In D/s, Bdsm, Daily news update..art,writing, collaborations, upcoming events, My journal on June 1, 2009 at 6:49 pm

En Route. My wingback has finally lifted..NYC and Jersystan , here I come!

Few words tonight, the  cat DOES have my tongue, the quiet before travel..

travel is always life altering in ways unexpected..

I am so happy about this trip..

have been waiting..with Lucifer shortly, collaboration, romance, friendship…I will be blogging my trip and taking photos,  check it out..

catdancin as always,

the cat xo

Cat howl

In D/s, Bdsm, My journal on May 27, 2009 at 11:31 am

Brilliant morning shot thru with metallica, icy, a polar dip, I want a birch brush beating, sauna, running in rough white toweled glee from briskly alive into the day.. blu on burgundy, rosy cheeked allejuahs, bitten ass, the whites of my iris and the stain of my swollen lip. Gonna cry. Why cry, cat?

I don't know.

I just am. 

   Leave me alone to curse the sun.

          Yes.

The radical power of D/s and S/m as threat to commodification of the sexual self.

In D/s, Bdsm on May 26, 2009 at 11:07 am

How can one possibly write briefly about Bdsm and the plethora of arts, symbolism, rich history and eros that it evokes?

At a certain point words simply fail. Despite the physicality of much of the sadomasochistic arts for example, these acts remain profoundly psychological..that is the desire to engage finds its genesis in the body/mind/soul self..

S/m IS an art form. D/s is IS intimately relational and pyscho/emotional.

The mind is theatre, Bdsm is theatre and those of us who taste and become more than here on a seasonal pass..have a capacity for imagination and a desire to have that capacity fed in ways perhaps others lack..

Some of us are adrenalin junkies, some of us find deep nurture in this world, some of us have a penchant for outside the box self expression, a driving need to convey to others and to mirror to self the originality that arises from our cores..

Many of us approach this theatre from all these angles.

Whatever our original portal into this world was..whether whispers of persuasions and tastes in childhood or discoveries thru involvments as adults..discoveries of something wanting in our relationships or discoveries of deep satisfactions previously unknown, Once awakened, it becomes a journey of self as unique, of self as social being, of mores and values, and choice and appetite.

Our appetites change as we evolve, and our appetites change with age.

In midlife, there seems a stopping point, a transition for many, a reawakening of the sexual identity questions that first emerged in adolescence, typically..

and the world of Bdsm spreads before us, expotentially increasing our capacities to find nuance and art form in the expression of our erotic selves beyond the normative vanilla scripting.

Why do so many keep what is essentially a photo journal here?

We could claim narcsissm, or exhibitionism as defined by current sociomedical techofuks, but I think something else is at play …

We live in a culture soaked in sexual imagery as commodity..sex as a means to sell..something else, product X or product Y.

It is NOT expression of sexuality for its own erotic sake…

We are surrounded by sex, and yet, we are a curiously desexualized culture, irony there, the true longing, that to express our sexual selves simply for the joy and pleasures, dark and light of such expression untied to commodification is a radical act, an act of taking back our eros as unfettered, free and innately OURS.

True eros IS untameable, and like art rather than science, it is messy, capricious, unpredictable, and dangerous.

It contains the mysteries of birth, death, liminal passageways, initiations, rites, esoteric mastery.

D/s and S/m’s powerful and haunting pull are hard to explain to the uniniated or unawakened..perhaps those that make it here to this world and take up residence have a deeper need to dream while awake, the stuff of nightmares AND rapture, the transformational..

Perhaps from the outside we are shunned as evil or outcasts because it is so powerful opening Pandora’s box, and like all that is innately spiritual and radical there have always been those who would seek to contain and control the mystical..

Simply because you cannot OWN mystical experience, you cannot force it, it is power spitting in so called power’s face..

Just some thoughts from the cat. Have a great day..thoughts back on this musing?

I'd love for you to engage me with YOUR ideas on this..
              cat

Lipstick meditations.

In D/s, Bdsm on May 22, 2009 at 6:30 pm

Bring it.

haha.

cat

What’s in a label? whether sex, medical, gender, disability, an opening thought..

In On Art/writing/creativity, Philosophy..sociological commentary on May 22, 2009 at 6:23 pm

The Who sang  “Who are you? Who, who? Who the Fuck are You?”

I ‘ve been thinking about the politics of identity lately, and when I say identity I am referring to all the qualifiers that we adher to. Our political persuasions, our sexual affinities, our brand preferences and status symbols, our socio medical labels, and the roles we identify with…parent, son, wife of, ect..

What’s in a label? Foremost there is freedom and there is constraint. Labels are a signifier to ourselves and to others…a signifier that points to a set of expectations based on our assumptions and experience with the word itself.

We may labor under the constraints of a label, or we may take flight within the kernels of realities attached.

However as I type this I’m staring at an orange resting on its side that I just bladed in half. And it came to me..as the ramble jam that is often the way I muse is want to do..

that a label is like an unpeeled orange, you pick it up, you can see its external properties, you have an expectation of what it will taste like..

bladed in half though the interior reveals so much more orangatastik detail.

Fat pulpy segments, a wagon wheel, light and dark shadings, the seeded center, the promise of punch…

I tend to be label sensitive. I agree that they are necessary, and expedite time and expectations.

Tonight , tho, I am reflecting on the downside of labels, and our drive to nail down our human experience like a coffin, labels often serve the establishment, unless reappropriated by a subculture as its own,

and the most powerful drive in labeling is to establish norms..

and norms as we all know or we should are culturally and historically specific and serve the power of the status quo.

I’m not advocating anarchy or a silence epidemic..haha, but perhaps that is why I find some of my most truthful sentiments are expressed thru art and the poetic..the inside view of the orange..

“Who are you, who the fuck are You, you you..”

Take away your labels this evening. Just for a night. Without them are you naked? And is that freeing or frightening?

More to come on this topic..I’ve just begun. Someone shut me up, please..laughing…I am not speaking to D/s here..I am speaking to the power of language across all spheres of internal and social experience, how we come to “know’ ourselves..and represent that to the world around us..

my next post on this will be speaking to the facsism and freedom inherent in language..with a focus on disability semantics..

cat

Quizzes for the Birds and Bees. A musing on the politics of sexuality research.

In D/s, Bdsm on May 21, 2009 at 11:30 am

What's in a kiss?Wow, I like to read many magazines, am a die hard fan of holding the glossy print page in my hand, curled on the couch, it remains a favorite down time treat of mine.

I do follow zines, but it’s not the same. I have the odd habit, ( one of many odd habits..hey another blog post idea there..) of reading from back to front, go figure..

Anyway, this months Scientific American Mind , which I usually follow for all its delish stuff on the latest brain neuro imaging research and leading edge of quantum musings, is completely dedicated to Sex.

That problematic word, sex as it means so many different things to different people, I prefer the word sexuality, yeah, there’s alot to be said for semantics.

There is an interesting article on Do Gays Have a Choice, by Robert Epstein.

This article contains an interesting 9 question quiz, entitled How Gay are You? and when I tabulated the results , I am supposedly ‘predominantly “homosexual” with ‘heterosexual ” tendencies…

A thought or two on this being calculated thru a minute long questionaire ..

the fact that I am predominantly het with some same sex imaginings and activities over an adult lifetime notwithstanding, the quiz made me smile, because the determination of who and what one is , is complex, contextual, and to some degree culturally determined.

I was given to ponder what would a similar quiz make of those with alternative D/s and S/m longings..exposure and opportunities and education count for much, when one has opportunity to meet others in the world of D/s and Bdsm what was once strange or even incomprehensible can become articulated and active.

The limits have some flexibility, we all know this as we journey..

There’s enormous sociopolitical power in labels , definitions ect, they have allowed expression of homosexuality to become more tolerated and understood, and I hope we are on a similar road as regards Bdsm.

Sexuality is magical. Sometimes monstrous. A part of  our core, and a lifetime’s rollicking ride..it expresses thru our dream lives, our relationships and experiences of our own body selves and aging. As well as WHO and how we express our sexual selves with.

Iniations include the profoundly biological markers of being birthed, birthing, parenting, aging, death itself.

A nine question one minute quiz tells me nothing.

My own blueprint of a lifetime of being in this body/self/soul tells me by the pattern that shows, ie, the ink, where I have been , and by what is absent, where I have not…

Embrace yourself, you are a snowflake , detailed, intricate and singular event in time, carry a banner label if it suits your purposes and helps you navigate from here to there, I remain on passport, passing thru..

awake, alive , aware.

Open, boundaried by this skin, and an observer of myself and others..

cat who is predominantly ‘alive ‘.  Morning.