Long distance D/s relationships. Surviving and thriving.

In D/s, Bdsm on April 17, 2009 at 4:00 pm

I am in an Ldr.

They are not for the faint of heart.

In the absence of community,

couples can find themselves isolated. How does one work the challenges  that invariably come with sustaining aM/s or  D/s relationship via distance?

One key is to not become completely isolated. Be part of a community online together,  reach out to others, do not sink into obscurity.

Significant relationships are embedded within a social context, the LDR faces special challenges this way.

The ldr allows us to communicate and grow with another we perhaps never would have met another way, however these relationships are challenged by lonliness, lack of physical proximities, and costs of travel.

Most would agree that to sustain one long term a relocation is eventually on the table. But what to do while figuring this out?

Here is some advice.

1. Use all mediums to establish consistent routines of contact and communication.

2.  Learn about D/s at a distance..it can thrive!  However it can also challenge the strongest of couples.

3. Early on , ask for and validate the identity of the individual one is getting to know.

4. Talk , talk, talk about expectation and have a JOINT game plan for how to handle the invariable down times and crises.

5. Meet when it becomes feasible to do so. These relationships are very real, and meeting is paramount.

6. Cyber is no longer the antiquated creature it once was limited to ICQ and texting..scening is possible and the limits are only your creativity.

7. Communicate, communicate, communicate! it does not always have to be heavy, in fact that will work against you, but share the various aspects of your separate lives.

8. Watch movies, porn, visit art sites online, send videos of your locales ,and yourself in a spectrum of activities.

9. Let the cams run..it’s the next best thing to being there, without always having to talk..this can be very enjoyable and revealing.

10. Keep your outside contacts and friends..remain multidimensional!

Just a short little list..I will revisit this topic tomorrow, ..ps, pics are my tribute to spring..me in my baseball cap and shades! bring on the daffodils.

Oh, reminds me..send snail mail, and flowers are always a delightful surprise, make the gifts personal..a small wallet picture ect..

have a great friday eve, cat



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