I want to blog tonight about the Hunger. The hunger’s an interesting thing…its larger than fucklust…it’s domain an entire cosmos.We all feel it to some degree,some of us more the so than others. It’s an assumption tho not entirely apt that if one is on a kink site it is because one feels the movements of the hunger in its true genesis..the appetites of the mind.
I’ve been cursed as a wildchild of the Hunger since birth.
I’ve sought (it can be a cruel taskmaster) to satiate it over a lifetime. In my youth I thought fuckin would lay the beast to rest but I learned this was not so…
I recall a lover in my twenties looking at me with a weird expression post coitus once, and saying slowly…fuckin you is not fuckin , babi..its like..annihilation.
Somewhere in what he mouthed was a key to the brand that has burned my ass down thru my journey. The Hunger’s a life sentence and I’m a Lifer within its velvet walls.
If the Hunger is not soothed by fuckin, what is it soothed by? I can only speak here for myself. I am drawn to the tale of Eros and Pysche…Eros being the greek god of longing and desire and Pysche being the human that fell in love with him.She stands for Mind and/or Soul. In some versions of the tale, they had a daughter whose name connotes…Pleasure.
I won’t go into the full tale here, but Pysche has been forbidden to shine her lamp upon her betrothed (he presents as beast). In a failure of faith and overcome with curiousity she does, and has a fleeting glimpse of his arresting beauty before he flees, leaving her grief stricken and searching the ends of the earth for her beloved.
The marriage of Eros and Psyche is a signpost to the Hunger, that which is larger than carnal and in its consumation we sense Heart. Heart’s latin roots are to be found in couer..for courage.
The Hunger has many manifestations, and it demands of us Heart. This earth ride is not for the weak of will.Some of us have had the luxury of becoming complacent..I don’t know but complacency is a luxury that has never set up residence in my body. I cannot brag..it is the way it has been, the cards I have been dealt.
Tonight I feel the Hunger…and I am old enough to know now it will never be satisfied and this is a Good thing because it gives me an appetite that keeps me curious, edged and alive.
Longing, desire, soul, and mind. From these Pleasure.
I lace up my sneakers, yeah, I’m restless and I go down to the asphalt and out into the night.
A car starts up beside me and even the sound of its engine is erotic, its red taillights smearing the dark air.
I surrender. I’m Hunger’s Wild Child. And you know what?
THAT is good enough for me…